Oh yes, I said it. Spring cleaning can be a good thing. I have finally dug out my totes from the basement containing my spring and summer clothes that I didn’t bother to hang in the closet last year. I was just too fat to fit into them. I felt bad last spring, trying to squeeze into these clothes, my favorite of all clothing seasons, my favorite clothes in my wardrobe, and I just couldn’t squeeze in to them! I was freshly unemployed so I didn’t even have the choice to go out and buy bigger clothes; I just had to make do with what I had.
Oh what a sad time. I have always been a bit of a fashionista, my image has always been a huge part of my self esteem and my image was suffering, so my self esteem was also down in the dumps. I also struggle with the thought of getting older: I’m terrified! I don’t want to be old; I don’t mind the thought of mature, but weathered and wrinkled is not appealing to me. That is a big part of why I quit smoking cigarettes (don’t tell anyone, they all think it is for health purposes). Okay, well the health aspect was also a consideration when I took that plunge. But that is part of why I have felt so confident about losing this weight. I quit smoking and gained weight, which was not fun at all, but I did quit smoking after over a decade of devotion and addiction to the tobacco companies. I just hit the two year mark this winter, and I was so proud of myself! No one else was, non smokers don’t really seem to understand. I don’t consider myself a non smoker, I consider myself a smoker in rehabilitation.
Back to spring cleaning, I tried on this pair of silk pants that I used to love, and they fit! I haven’t actually fit in them for at least two summers, not just last summer, so this seems like a huge step for me! I want to keep losing weight, or rather, becoming more toned, so I am starting a new workout program tomorrow that my friend loaned me. It is called “slim in six” AKA “death in six”. I haven’t tried it yet, it sounds hard, but I really want to keep progressing in my weight loss goals, or more importantly, continuing to tone my body to become more attractive to me and everyone else.
My diet continues to stay strong, I am still eating healthy and avoiding over consumption of alcohol. I do need to work out more, which is why I would like to try out a workout regimen that might make me feel more accountable. This latest development, trying on my summer clothes, the chore I have been avoiding for a few weeks now, I am so glad I finally tried them on! The result really pumped my self esteem to start this new week fresh! I can’t wait to finish trying them all on and see how everything fits. And if they don’t all fit well, it is a goal to work towards.
